Ego-trimmer Mugs

"... Of course 'you've never let success go to your head'. You've never been successful at anything!"

Christmas tree with wadded up lights.

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

New Swiss Army Knife

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

Important Muscles.

'The government is telling us to get rid of 43% of meaningless targets within the next 6 months!'

"Most projects require three hands."

"On a personal note, my wife, Ann, and I have agreed to separate, as I've fallen in love with the sound of my own voice."

You will do as I command...'It had a power surge.'

"You forgot to adjust your hilling discs again, didn't you?"

"Does it have a chapter on using the phone to call someone who can do it right?"

Dave had yet to master his new nail machine gun.

Menace.

'What's this 'H' file?'

"In your skill set I see that you listed, 'Proofleader.'"

Spring cleaning.

'I am going to do a spot of gardening, have you seen my ear protectors?'

Rudy, we're going to have to cut expenses. We already did that, boss. I don't think you're clear on the concept, minion. It's a way of life. Did you read one book and then never read again? Did you listen to one song and then never listen to another again? Did you kiss someone once and then never again? Cutting expenses isn't something you do just once. A good businessman cuts expenses constantly. Whether he needs to or not. You trim the fat. When you run out of fat, you trim the nerves and the

Adult attention deficit disorders (A.A.D.D.)

Scrapyard Worker

Christmas tree lights - "Are they on yet love?"

"When they used him on a NASA shuttle, it gave him a big head!"

"Darling, size is not important!"

A man connected to his PC.

'We'd make a great circus act. He balances the checkbook and I juggle the bills.'

Plato's Republic as it was written and as it would have been written if Plato's academy had invested in a good word processor,

Christmas 2020

Christmas.

Gracie cuts the bottom branches off the Christmas tree to make room for presents.

Charlie Dimmock T-shirts for gardeners.

Hair trigger