Education Evaluator Gifts

"I didn't go to college, but I took out and am defaulting on school loans to make it look like I did."

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

"If i were to kiss you then there is a 17% probability that we might get married and that has a 24% likelihood that we'd have children with a 34% change of divorce...I'm not sure I can risk it."

"This statement from your headmaster says that you can easily get a good degree...your bank manager says you can't."

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"

"Compare Calculate Contrast Before you make a move"

'We consult those with whom we agree, which is why I rarely consult my conscience.'

"Thank you, Mr. Mulvaney, but what we're really looking for is someone with talent."

"I like an attentive lover, but these feedback forms are ridiculous."

'Whose idea was it to use enron as a benchmark?'

'This is our real-time chat room.'

"When you say you love your life, should I be happy for you?"

'See, this is proof that your criticism of our educational system is right on!'

'This is the time when the University started to rank our research by the number of publications, not the quality of the publications...'

Scale indicates the value of books.

Sex Score

'We first met here - when I was doing your job.'

"Room, board, books, and tuition--I draw the line at corkage fees."

Grading Guidelines.

"Has it been in your family long?"

"Done with the evaluations? Great! Now let's evaluate the evaluations!"

"While it's true most of my grades have gone down, most were on low volume."

'Government performance targets reach unprecedented levels.'

"I think it's an early version of facebook."

"It all began with trying to measure project outcomes."

'And as a new client of our law firm, you get this nifty neck brace to wear in court.'

"It's our first anniversary, so I've written up your performance review...."

'Some mentor you turned you turned out to be.'

"Buying stuff online has rekindled Sean's literary ambitions. They're always asking for customer reviews."

"Also, that random comment you made three years ago will count against you."

'Don't sweat it - We grade on the curve.'

'Your new boyfriend has potential, needs some omprovement. Overlooks a few things.' 'My husband is an estate agent.'

"Perhaps you're to blame for having unrealistic expectations."

"Some people think it's as valid as testing our teachers."

'Felton,has it occured to you that you may have taken a talent for self-effacement a bit too far?'