Economic Pun Lover Gifts

Banks held up by Euro umbrellas.

'This is a market correction.'

"We briefly thought we balanced the budget, but it was 'fake math'."

"I keep feeling we should float the company"

'A representative from Merrill Lynch to see you.'

'We will not kick the can down the road... Does anyone know how to use a can opener?'

'This financial report is frightening. Who wrote it, Stephen King?"

"While we're on the subject of earnings, does anyone have a clever metaphor using the word, 'toilet'?"

"Our Big Hairy Audacious Goal is balding."

I like you and I like your company!

'Henderson makes money the old fashioned way - White collar crime.'

"Now that's how to declare a dividend!"

"Class, this is David. He's our new financial exchange student."

"Is that your answer to everything? 'Chase the dot?'"

"I've got an MBA. Massive Business Anxiety."

'I am on a diet! It's called the Wall Street diet. I invested in British Airways, and the first day I lost 500 pounds.'

'Smith, where exactly did you get your experience in 'Hedge Fund Management'?'

I think I can explain what happened to your investment, with the use of this simple chart.

To the grim reaper: 'You may go in now.'

Mergers or acquisitions.

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

"Yes, the market did advance this week, Rebecca, but we feel it's somewhat of a 'dead-cat bounce.'"

'Just this once, but I want a piece of the action.'

'Yea, I give away the fire. I make my money on insurance.'

'There's a bear on line one and a bull on line two. Who do you want me to put through first?'

'I know you're new to upper management, Hoskins, but here we don't catnap...we power nap.'

'It's a retrospective of Bernanke's most obtuse economic jargon...'

A good executive is known by the company he keeps solvent.

Inflating assets to get a loan. Too poor to pay taxes

"I'd love to help but at the moment I'm saddled with this enormous mortgage."

'He's known for his pessimistic prognostications on the stock market.'

'Well, call it 'diet stocks'. Your bank account won't get fat because of the dividend income.'

Calls of the Wild: Moose Call, Coyote Call and Margin Call.

"Although the collection plate appears to be half full, our accountant assures me that it is half empty."

'Your investments aren't under performing, they're just appreciation challenged.'