Eccentric Gift Lover T-Shirts

Family heirlooms that will never make it onto the mantelpiece.

'Here you go, kid! A worm.'

"All natural snow cones for sale."

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

You don't need to believe EVERYTHING you are told.

'We have three minutes left.'

"It's my home grown quail call. Quail don't come when I blow it, but cows sure do."

Diner

Whittling a forget-me-not moose for the one you adore...

Fly fishing.

"I'll give you $5 for that shirt."

Pull my finger! Zombie Humor.

High speed cinder block

CEO.

"Oh, Oh, Oooohh!"

'Will you be wanting this?'

'The worst thing about it is I'm claustrophobic.'

'Your deceased husband keeps saying: don't call him. He'll call you.'

Bio-Engineered Fruit of the Month Club

'What do you mean these aren't donut holes'

'It's too cheap, can I haggle you up?'

"Shouldn't have, you really."

'I can't believe an Alligator stole my identity... I mean, it's quite obvious I'm a Crocodile!'

'Have there been any side effects from the medicine?'

Hottest Tix in TownSpecial Mets promotion dates

Beware of Everything

"There were some squiggly bits left over after the operation, so we gave you a doggie bag."

Luigi's Career Change From Pizza Shop Owner to Masseuse Goes Smoothly...

'It's from my staff...make sure it's not carnivorous.'

Ball Pool Peril

"I realize you don't want to miss that important business call next week, but setting your alarm to go off every 10 minutes until then is getting really annoying."

"It's not so bad! But I DO have to sleep on my side. . .2