Earphone Escapist T-Shirts

Maybe you shouldn't listen to the game while you're trimming the shrubs.

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

Audio Books

Tangled Earphones Support Group.

"I'm looking for a data plan that will be constantly out of service so I can tell my dates I didn't mean to ghost them."

Man trapped in bubble from bubble bath.

I'd like to order a power outage. Huh? My wife's on her phone all day, my son plays video games nonstop. My boss finds me by email wherever and whenever. My pager rings 'round the clock! Say again? I was text messaging. Pull the plug, man!

'and for pushing your umbrella button in a VERY crowded elevator.'

'What a day! My secretary was out, our biggest customer canceled a large order, the computer broke down, I didn't have any lunch, and leaving work I got stuck for an hour in the elevator with an 18 year old nympho with big breasts!'

'Ocean sounds won't be heard, so that we may bring you a paid commercial program on offshore investment opportunities.'

"He went that-a-way." (snail escapes).

Man opens front door to find he's up in clouds.

Houdini 2019

'If you wish to be put on hold, press one...'

"Please hold...for music while you wait..."

"Someone wants to talk to you about your jeep's extended warranty."

Hiding From Social Media

"Anywhere that doesn't have TVs, computers, radios, ipods, cell phones, or video games."

"Meet my cats - Step Over Me, Dust Around Me, and Sit Somewhere Else."

Message in a bottle.

'If you keep running away, son, you'll never make it through your formative years.'

'Tell me if this hurts.'

"You're a very lucky man, Mr. David. Your insurance covers it."

"You know, on second thought maybe I'll take the stairs."

"Yo've got to be more specific, Ed. Wake you when what's over?"

Sometimes you wanna go where nobody knows your name

'Only six more floors to my cubicle.'

'I've got to go, Alice, you know how the boss frowns on personal calls.'

'A lovely area, but not enough waiters!'

Virtual Reality Check

"Move over! - I just got the bill!"

"I have no problem with reality. It's just the occasional intrusion of gritty realism that I hate."

"For your Birthday gift, I decided to stay off my phone for the entire day. You'll be proud of me, I lasted almost an entire hour!"

Message In Bottle In Bottle