Early Achievers Gifts

I only said my first word

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

"Yes Dad, I passed math and now I'm passing chemistry and physics."

Overjumpers

'Mom, Dad! Look what I created in lab today!'

"A student skipped a model U.N. meeting – now he's claiming diplomatic immunity."

'You need an education or you will wind up in some fast food place.'

"Where would you see yourself in five years' time?"

Professor Wiles grows insufferable.

School. Report Card. You couldn't name the presidents and flunked history? Yeah -- It's not what you know, it's who you know.

'What's play?'

"Doing your homework may lead to a job that has homework."

"So, what's gonna be your favorite class?"

Exam

U of Debt

'Wow! I never thought it would actually WORK!'

What else is there to wish for?

'May I be excused? I just checked my college investment portfolio online, and I feel sick.'

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

How come rich kids do so well on SAT tests? Their parents give them books, fancy trips, lessons and

'I can't believe I didn't get that promotion. So many people have passed me by I feel like a road sign on the highway to success.'

"Your MBA and PHD are impressive but what concerns me is your low number of Facebook friends."

His Master's Thesis.

GCSEs

"I lettered in spelling."

Congratulations! All that cramming paid off.

'Congratulations, you graduated.'

Super Student