Dungeon Masters Pillows

Thanks for the heads up on the gelatinous cube!

Nobody mourned Sir Dad-Joke.

'I think they're up to something.'

Ale. Mead. It's been a hard knight's day!

'Sorry, I can't come: Young Master has joined the scouts and tied me up with a fancy knot I can't work out...'

'Court is in recess for one hour. Everyone convene on the playground and we will choose sides for dodgeball!'

He smiled to himself, enjoying his victory in hide and side. But soon, the next activity would start.

Wow. A corner office at last

Trout Game

Earl and Lance struggle with their new invention, Chessers."

'This bed comes with a remote monster-under-the-bed option.'

I'm no longer welcome at the county fair.

I don't know … some days it all feels like a big game.

'Oh, you know, the usual...just working.'

"Eat your candy. There's obese children in America who'd beat you with a stick to eat that."

Musical Chairs: Because kids don't already have a hard time fitting in.

"I should have paid more attention in math class."

'My work clothes are at the cleaner's, so I had to borrow my kid's hoodie.'

Party games.

Cheating Death

You're doing "taxes", huh? What's your high score?

Large Whist Party in Small Room

Official Support Groups

"What a great way to end our winter breaks! We came here alone...but we're not leaving alone!"

'This is only 1:100 in scale to what I plan.'

In Tray Out Tray Suspicious Tray

On the Eve of his epic defeat by 'Deep Blue', Garry Kasparove awoke to an ominous warning,

'No I didn't cast Detect Evil to work it out! Let's just say I aced my Female Intuition roll...'

"I find it very significant that you would rather play house."

"How do I keep my kids in line? I threaten to rent out the space under their beds to monsters."

'Down to 43 hit points? ?have you been fighting again?'

'What do you intend doing with your life, Son?' 'Ooh... Let's not tempt fate, Dad.'

Lair Freshner

Whack - a - mole.

It's harder to pitch a perfect game in baseball than to roll a perfect game in bowling. In bowling it only takes twelve strikes.