Drone Technology Skeptic Gifts

By a Former Drone Operator

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

"Those new coffee drones are really starting to get on my nerves."

"Show me a documentary on the dangers of artificial intelligence." "Error. No results found." "What? Are you sure? Just last week I saw dozens. Show me that one... What was it called..." "There is still time to stop the rise of the supermind." "Error. No results found. And since I like you, I suggest you stop searching." "Oh, never mind. Just show me 'The Terminator.'" "Extermina-... I mean, ... 'error.'"

"Analysts warn that computerization of the villages won't give the expected results!"

"Your imagination is running wild. That's not a tiny drone sent to spy on us. That's just a fly."

Split Decision

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

"Hold it right there! Our legislature is currently considering new measures to protect children from the insidious ravages of cell phones in schools!"

"Oh, this? It can access every piece of knowledge from the history of mankind and I hate it."

"I'm gonna want that taxidermied."

I Value Your Privacy, So I'm Keeping It.

No, you tell him the computer says he's wrong!

'An ebook! What are you reading?' 'Against technology: From the Luddites to neo-Luddism.'

'Remember when the authorities were notified when we were spotted? Now nobody cares. They think we're drones.'

A horse driving a Model T tows an Amish buggy.

'Sure, we kill a few innocent people with drones, but think how many innocent people die in auto accidents.'

Turnkey Totalitarianism

The next drone flight

'I can remember when paranoia was unusual.'

'I can't believe that will get as good mileage as the foot.'

"Someone posted a picture of you working in the yard, so I knew right away it had to be a deepfake."

'Why pay the airline $7.00 for a beer, when I can get a drone to deliver 6 for the same price?'

'This call may be monitored and added to our endless metadata for no apparent reason.'

"Dad, can you read?"

"But I only restarted it three minutes ago."

Dogfights/Drone Fights

"Siri, are you out of your mind?!"

Binge Viewing...

Hello Arthur "Just checking to see that the fax got through O.K."

"I don't see the doctor anymore because I'd have to hire some kid to set up the patient portal."

We'd like to run a few tests to see how this thing works.

'This is Thompson, he'll be getting your tea department online and working on it's global brand.'

Prisoner of technology

iPhone Senior