Driving Student Pillows

"When I let out a blood curdling yell and scream 'Jesus Christ you're going to kill someone' I'd like you to apply the brakes..."

'Kid, you flunked the driving test. But you get high marks in audio system tuning, cell phone fumbling, and GPS fiddling.'

'Was that a red light? You should know that it is highly unethical to take liberties just because the instructor is drunk...'

'That's not what I meant by dipped headlights.'

"And remember, the hand position on the steering wheel is 10 & 2, 9 & 3 and 8 & 4.""

'It's the first time I've been asked to do this in the middle of a driving test. . .'

'They can also be used to keep an eye on the traffic around you.'

'Now, Mr Jones, I'd like you to hotwire the ignition.'

'You would fail Mr Burns! What have you forgotten. I will give you three guesses.'

"At the next planet I'd like you to press destroy."

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

"Why do they do that?"

'So what's it like riding in first class?'

Thru versus Through Traffic

Road sign: "Good Start, but you've still got a ways to go."

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

GAS PRICES AT PUMP

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

"I need to tinkle."

"Gimme a large cheeseburger, regular fries and a diet root beer!"

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

"I used to love power, but now I'm more interested in mileage."

'Wavering between being bullish or bearish'

Please Drove Carefully.

"Why do they call it rush hour when no one goes anywhere?"

Cats on Board.

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

"Two burgers, two fries, two martinis—and we'll have those to go."

How am I abducting?

A 'Falling Rock' and a 'Deer Crossing' zone.

Music to drive ( others mad) to...

'Can you see what's causing the hold up?'

Songs about Texas, next 1100 miles.

A man in a car waits for a large herd of cows to cross the road; once they have crossed he finds a cow sitting in the passenger seat of his car.