Driving Dilettante Pillows

"Well, how was I supposed to know the other driver wasn't going to turn left?!"

Garlic Free Zone.

'What we need is a decision, not more foot-dragging.'

'We're not at home, Stu. You can't just order 'I don't care'.'

Somewhere in France - The Eliot sisters come face to face with escargots.

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

'House wine?'

"I asked a designer to come in and give the office a needed pick-me-up...probably should have been a little more specific."

'You know me, I'm a problem solver. I listen. I flirt with understanding. I move on.'

Turn around at the next junction, turn around now! Turn around immediately - you've forgotten your handbags!

"What wine goes well with £5.52p?"

'Erm...I ordered the omlette!'

"Past performance is no guarantee of future results."

"Would you prefer sparkling water, filtered water, tap water or water?"

'Should I buy or sell?'

'We've considered every potential risk except the risks of avoiding all risks.'

They used a scientific method to decide which new product idea to pursue.

"'Scuse me, Officer, but where do the elite meet to eat around here?"

"The job stress was already bad enough, but now I have to choose between 56 flavors of coffee."

The singles bar...

"You know who's a big pain in the a*s? Europe."

One Way/Two Ways.

'Excuse me - Which way is Southwestern North Carolina?'

'Ambiance or non-ambiance?'

'He has trouble choosing what he wants.'

'I sure hope this 'timeout' thing is just a phase with Mom.'

'You don't do faith healing do you?'

"You are headed south. Your destination is straight ahead."

Teddy Roosevelt Institute. "Walk softly and carry a big stick." Charm school. Harm school.

'Dressage? But Son, what about something more virile like Rodeo or Polo?'

Up, down, whatever (elevator with apathy)

IRS. Pay Taxes Here. It's the amount owe

Freeway exits: Should, Woulda, Coulda.

'If you're ready, who wants to go first?'

'I don't need a GPS. I'm guided by greed.'