Drink Tasting T-Shirts

"I don't know if I've mentioned this before, Greg, but you are a very attractive man."

"I'm sorry, but 'just plain old coffee' no longer exists."

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"This place has the best happy hour."

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

Sloaney Pony.

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

'A cheeky red?'

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

Wine Lady

Yoga for Alcoholics

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

Sauvignon Bonk

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

'Oh, and I suppose I'm the only one who's ever heard it's a 'dog eat dog world'?'

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

'Tastes like cherry kool-aid, what's it do?'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

Picking pastries.