Draft Perfectionist T-Shirts

"Right here is where you lost the narrative flow."

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

Bullseye!

"Great plan. Could we get some more details?"

"Various entrances to the gates of Hell."

"I’ve seen better metaphors in my litter box."

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

"By God, for a minute there it suddenly all made sense!"

'I feel confident about our presentation. If there is any blowback, don't worry. We're both wearing our flak jackets under our suits.'

'I told you, you were missing a decimal point.'

'I hope you made the prospect say no three times before you gave up.'

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

Man and woman buying furniture.

Professor McWit, Didn't Publish, So Perished.

Poetry repairman

Writer

"Wallace couldn't come, but I brought some of his fussy prose."

Perfection

"I think she marked yours in blue pen because she used up all her red on mine."

Christmas Present Wrapping Service.

Cuts, Measurements, Certain, Sloppy

"You're welcome."

Football Crazy.

'I'm a narcissist? - Are you saying I'm not perfect?'

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

Confident Business Team - We Know We Can

"Well, no wonder you can't think! There's your brain over there on the floor!"

"Larry made that chair from a pile of sticks."

A tailor measuring a jacket.

'I made hundreds of copies to give to all the students in my school. By the way, the color printer is out of ink.'

'It's a nice font but before deciding we'd really like to see your font library.'

Desk trays - 'Do it' and 'Do it right this time'.

"I don't think he can touch your in-the-dirt ball."

"Take away his brilliant prose, and he's just some depressed guy."