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Life Remaining Progress Bar

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

Playing Fetch.

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

Carefree luggage.

'3 Second Loading Zone.'

Campaign for Plain English

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

Life is for the birds.

"May I have this arythmic flail?"

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

I'm looking for a man who can meet my needs - Cream meringue master-chef.

"Either that's Marmaduke with a lizard's head in front of us, or I really mixed up my meds."

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

Romance

"Jackie, why does your relationship status read ‘capitulated to’ me?!"

So Close..

"When you say that love is in the air, you're referring to the smells from the food trucks, right?"

Right click for yes...

"I think therefore I am." "Bow Wow, Bow Wow, Bow Wow."

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

'Cow in love'

"Like I could date a guy from Notre Dame."

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

"This is nice, but I can't help but think we forgot something."