Doomster With A Twist Pillows

'The good news is he won't survive to say 'I told you so'.'

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

'Dang it, I just washed this street. Boy, every time...'

You wrote a book report on a video game instruction manual?

"Drunk, yet orderly"

'Hey, I think my parents fooled me. This game is called 'Algebra Hero'.'

'I don't think you quite grasp our overall motif.'

'Frankendumpty'

"C'mon! C'mon! Almost there..."

The End of the World is Nigh - man with placard

The Big Idea vs The Small Change

Hotel mini-bar.

Man and dog playing a car simulation. The dog has a fan to simulate his head out of the window.

Wow! It's like I'm in a real field with cows and everything!

'They come down here to smoke.'

"I kept following my dreams until my dreams filed a restraining order against me."

"It might be a better trick if you didn't use see-through glass"

'I always come outside for a smoke.'

BMX Tricks

'Whatever you do don't press the parallel dimensions button again!'

'If the Mayan calendar is right, how should I back up my files?'

Nijinsky Moving Company . Ballet dancers.

"It's a wireless mouse...filed with catnip!"

The Grim Reaper feeding pigeons arsenic.

"Now where did I park my car?"

Extreme Court Reporting

Customs and Examinations.

Piñata Blackjack

'Are you sure you followed the pattern right?'

'I hired a decorator.'

Lady with facemask smoking

'No, it doesn't connect to an X-box!'

An entry from the encyclopedia of gaming: Digital Doppleganging: unplugging an inept player and letting them think they are playing while the computer really is.

You're gonna love this, little buddy. What? The company that makes the "Call of Duty" game licensed my life story. The game will be just like a first-person shooter

"Let's go someplace awful to avoid the tourists."