Doomsday Visionaries Pillows

"I wonder if we might benefit from socializing more with those who don't harbor anti-government views."

"Fred's calculating what future natural catastrophes he can ignore based on his probably life span."

Optimist

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

Apocalypse Research Center

"Elon Musk is buying rope and walnuts."

'So, what do you want to be when you grow up: rebel scum or loyal servant of the supreme android republic?'

Chicken - "The Dow is falling...the dow is falling..."

Cheer up-things aren't so bad.....

"All I'm saying is now is the time to develop the technology to deflect an asteroid."

'Good. Then there's no reason to stay on this diet any longer.'

"Has anyone seen my therapist?"

"He's really excited about this new proposal to let staff take over services."

'Like us, the Hula Hoop will never go out of style.'

National Optometrists Association. O.K., whose idea was it to form a focus group?…

Judgment Day is coming next Monday. Repent. Now, hold on. How can I believe you when so many dire prophecies haven't come true? I sealed myself in a shelter twice in the late '60s, hid in the Appalachian Mountains a decade later. A huge bunching of Judgment Day visions in the late '80s led me to simply get a time share in the Colorado mountains … Getting out of town doesn't spare you Judgment Day. I don't think. Lemme double-check the clues in Marmaduke. Mostly I needed an excuse to get away. Th

'The hardest part of being a street crazy is picking each day's sign.'

'To prepare for Y2K, I backed up all discs and documents. . . stockpiled water and non-perishables. . . converted my investments to cash and set up a wood burning stove.'

'Don't worry...you'll grow into them.'

'My father carried this sign before me, as did his father before him.'

'You have a 9:00 A.M. appointment with your ophthalmologist to check your vision and a 11:00 A.M. appointment with the staff to rally the troops around your vision.'

The End is Near art gallery opening.

Sun crashing into sea foils rescue attempt.

Poll: The World Will End With: Nuclear War, Global Warming, Assault Weapons.

"And then yesterday, I had an epiphany: The best way for me to overcome my paralyzing fear of a global ecological/economic collapse is to find a way to turn it into a lucrative career!"

How to survive the coming crash.

Climate Change Contingency House

The End is Near/Just the Beginning

'I-need-bifocal-itis.'

I survived end of the world after party.

"I find your projections a little pessimistic, Lee."

Goldfish Insurance: " We must insure against a deluge of BIBLICAL proportions. . ."

"What really bothers me is he's my financial advisor."

The World Ends Today!: 'Never mind, dear- better luck tomorrow!'

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