Domestic Hero Gifts

Husband does the housework

'Mum said you were the first man she ever trained, Dad.'

"You can't leave! I haven't had dinner yet!"

"I wish you'd get more in touch with your masculine side, Robert"

"I take it the toilet is fixed?"

The other mark of Zorro.

Human Dust Buster

Believe it or not: Once upon a time Dads couldn't even boil water.

"It's pre-set. Just put in the next load. . . push start. If trouble, hit 'Panic' and run."

"It's Mother's Day. It's your turn to watch the kids."

"You were supposed to take it to be repaired today."

"Sloth is a sin."

'I think the microwave has finally given up the ghost.'

'Daddy, what did you do on Armed Services Day?'

Man faced with a fridge full of food can't find the dinner left for him by his wife

A Message from Marion

"He was devastated when I broke my arm - what with the dishwasher packing up too."

"The car wouldn't start. My train was late..I wonder what the third thing will be?"

A woman calls her husband to save her from a bug.

'My wife just can't understand why I want to do the laundry.'

'Yes, yes, Rupert, you are still a mighty hunter. Now, please bring the turkey back to Luisa in the kitchen.'

'Honey, can I have an entourage?'

Man of steel wool.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

"The dryer giveth and the dryer taketh away."

"I don't know, kids. I've been a stay-at-home dad for so long it just sort of... happened."

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

"Maybe the unseen hand of the market will change the diaper."

"Can I multi-task? As a single mom I'm both the bread-winner and bread-baker!"

'Caw blimey!'

"I was ironing the curtains and fell out of the window..!"

'Sometimes I wish we'd never told him he was adopted.'

Miracle Mom #5,293

The household cavalry