Domestic Dynamic Observer T-Shirts

"You're so negative, Charles."

'Sure, go ahead! Evolve! It's all the rage, I know! Have fun! I'll just sit here in this murky, primordial soup with nothing but plankton for company. Why should you stay here with your mother? The one who raised you, fed you...'

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

What are we doing today? Installing raised beds. Then we'll plant them for a couple who want organic vegetables. Brilliant, Dad. Tree's Tree Nursery. You take the hard work out of gardening. Right. And give it to me! Right again!

'We're doing the right thing, Bob, Let Andy solve problems with bullies at school his own way,,,'

"Mom, are you sure I'm not adopted?"

"So this is the Mr. Waring who has made such a great impression on my little girl."

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

Origins Of Evolution

"Attention, wanna-be son-in-law ... we're losing!"

'Simple case of gravity, mom.'

What he lacks in ability and experience he makes up in being the chairman's son.

I think it's time he left home.'

"If it slows down, just ask my father about the murder he always swears he did not commit."

Good solution. Now we need a good problem.

Look,that is not your Daddy

His real name is Jasper Underwood Farthington III...but we just call him 'Stinky'.

"Happy anniversary, dear. How about a second honeymoon?" "Sure. Who with?"

'Tom's always been the black sheep of the family.'

"Just wait until my autobiographical one-woman show."

"Hey. Smells funny. Fix it. And bring me a beer."

"Nice try, Frank. Mother is still coming for the weekend."

"Really, Mr. Stevens, this fantasy of being turned into a giant frog is absurd. We both know there's no such thing as a curse, and you can't seriously believe your mother-in-law is actually a witch. . ."

'They're always going on and on about 'carrying management' so this seemed like a natural...'

"Your mom is a little overprotective, isn't she?"

'Thanks for coming. Now, let's see if we can bring this negotiation to closure.'

'My principal wants to see you about my principles.'

"And what can I do for you, Sir?"

'Will I be able to have a night light if we switch to solar power?'

'oh...You're home, just when my spirits were rising.'

"Now mommy, I know there has been some bad blood between us."

"Son, this is going to hurt me more than it's going to hurt you."

"The gods aren't angry, Tara. They're just hurt and disappointed."

'I'm his best friend, until his wife walks in.'

"You'll do anything to get out of taking out the garbage."