Domestic Bibliophile Gifts

"Talk nerdy to me."

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

Edgar Allen Poe

The Dorrie Decimal System

Little dog in Romance section in bookstore under sign: 'Puppy Love'

Honoré de Balzac

"Now Playing: One of those Jane Austen movies."

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

"Not that I have the time, but I enjoy reading."

Meet the author - celebrity autobiographies,

'The pile of unread books by the bed looks bigger than the futon...'

Literary Canines.

"Barb's such a fast reader."

Litterary Dogs.

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

'Read that last part back to me.'

'This book is so rare it's never been published.'

"I've been having stomach problems. I sit on the bathroom for 30 minutes in the morning...and a half-hour in the evening."

A man and his dog both reading.

Cook in the cookery section.

"Nevermore."

'It's very fast-paced. The book was over before I could finish reading it.'

'Chicken soup for dummies who don't sweat the small stuff.'

'Yes, your papers seem to have lots of citations, but I've checked: They're all self-citations...'

The Grapes of Wrath finally get some professional help.

'I'm a writer.' - 'What a coincidence, I'm a reader.'

Self-Improvement, Self-Empowerment, Self-Aggrandizement

"Spoiler alert...Z."

"And last week I nearly crashed while reading on the freeway..."

Heaven

Women who Read Too Much

"Boy, these are really overdue!"