Dojo Dweller Pillows

"This guy's good!"

Karate

"He'll never be good enough to snatch this pebble from my hand."

'The first move you must learn, is how to open your wallet and pay for your lessons.'

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

The Art Student.

Overjumpers

"I've no idea. Maybe it's the slumber channel."

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

Cat says of armadillo, 'It's one of those big armored rats.'

"As near as I can figure, we're in the Unpainted Desert!"

Black Belt/Yellow Belt/Green Belt/No Belt.

In case of emergency, break glass.

"Because webmasters don't take out the trash, that's why"

''A desk job.' That's what they called it at the interview.' 'Same here.' 'SHH!'

Mohammad's motors

'Have you had a brazilian?'

Spooning

"Today you will learn the 'Paper Cut' technique."

Florist "Say it with cacti"

''Surprise' starts with an 'S', Wilkins! You're in the wrong drawer again!'

Wifi whore

'Don't worry about the company's pension plan. The way we work you, you'll be lucky to live that long!'

"Arianna Stassinopoulos Huffington should write a book about you!"

Businessman at a bar mad to look like desk. Bartender says: 'The usual, Mr. B?'

"A cactus! Darling, you're such a romantic..."

Platitudes for the hopelessly realistic. When life gives you lemons, get a gift receipt.

"The WiFi password is: 'buysomethingorgetout'."

Full work boxes: 'IN and MORE IN'.

'I've noticed that no matter how busy you are, you are never too busy to stop an talk about how busy you are.'

'I'd like to come home... if I could.'

'Bring me the Wimbish report and a short worm, Ms Perkins, no time for lunch today.'

The weightless office.

'I'm afraid Mr. Caldwell doesn't want to see you now. However, you're free to visit his web site.'