Dog Owner Sibling Gifts

If dogs were psychiatrists.

"Other end, Steve. We've already met."

Yeah, I'm still potty training him.

'Firestone! Gee, that's an unbelievable diagnosis, Doctor!'

'You've got restless wag syndrome.'

This is your park - get busy and clean up the doggie-doo!

Dog to dog: 'I hate the way pointers are always blaming somebody else.'

"St. Louis? Peoria? Savannah? Buddy suddenly realized he was lost."

'This refrigerator isn't big enough for the both of us.'

'This device helps me determine what my dog is thinking. He thinks Bob Barker should mind his own business.'

"I used to chase the ball, but since I'm in better shape than him, it's better for him to chase it for awhile."

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

A large leaf falling on a dog

Caveman's dog with head outside car window.

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

Rusty starts to have very violent thoughts toward his tail.

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

Collies Without Borders

"This never happened."

'Don't be embarrassed by your anti-barking collar, implanted tracking chip, and GPS device. Just think of them as fashion accessories.'

"He sits there all day waiting to chase the email man."

'They're dog roses!'

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

''I couldn't wait any longer.''

'Now, you're new here, but you should know the rules: I get Master's newspaper and slippers! Got that?'

"All you're doing is emboldening cats."

Chasebook

Pet Entertainers

'Marm doesn't understand, 'I've got it, I've got it'.'

"The first step is admitting you're a dog."

'Oh that just means he wants you to rub his tummy.'

"We get fantastic indoor facilities during the cold months."

Dog Birthdays

"Thank goodness for pet doors because the alarm on my piddle clock was about to ring on the rug."