Dog-loving Foodie Pillows

"Bungle the flip! Bungle the flip!"

Dog Chow Mein

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

'I'll have toast and he'll have a complete dog's breakfast.'

"Can I have a doggie bag to go?"

'Rover is sulking because he helped bag the goose and all he gets for dinner is dog food.'

Dog orders the food 9 out of 10 dogs prefer.

"For what he is about to receive may the dog be truly thankful."

"Kibbled, canned and frozen were non-starters. But he'll often accept a ice ribeye as long as it's been properly dry aged."

'Sure, it's a nice buffet, but I can't help thinking it's a bit morbid...'

Posh dog views expensive food and wine.

'I don't care if top breeders do recommend it - I am not going to eat dog food!'

"He won't wait for me to open the can."

"Look, I’m sorry - it’s not Asian fusion night!"

"Can I have another free biscuit for my dog?"

'I pity the poor schlub whose job it is to make that call.'

Dog Food: Lick & Collect

"How could I refuse to share with a best friend!"

'I'm sorry Jane, but this time your anthropomorphism has gone too far.'

"I'm getting a little peckish. Hey! How dare you ignore me. I don't care if I have to go out or not, I'm waking you up at 4 a.m."

'Dang! Oh well, I won't have to feed him for a year now.'

"Some dehydrated corn and bone meal for the gentleman, perhaps?"

'So you want two opposable thumbs so you can open your own dogfood?'

'Believe me, I've checked. There are no shows on the Food Channel devoted to cooking kibble.'

"We'll be needing a high chair for spot."

"Wait! I forgot the garnish."

Limits of Canine Philosophical Inquiry.

"Well-done coming right up."

"Have you got a book about the proper way of feeding a dog?"

'I'll take your word for it that dog food tastes good on crackers.'

'I can understand my mother and my first-grade teacher being there, but there's also a TV announcer who does dog commercials and a second-string catcher for the Detroit Tigers.'

The Four Basic Food Groups - Dry, moist, biscuit, bone.

"Well, I won't be asking 'what's for dinner' for awhile."

"I'll have whatever I'm hearing being opened in the kitchen."