Dog Lover With A Wild Side T-Shirts

"No...ha-ha, no, but seriously, boy, I'm going to have to eat you now."

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

Dog Dressed to Eat

"Where is everyone?" "You had 'everyone' killed." "Stalin family reunion"

'A representative from Merrill Lynch to see you.'

Pin the blame on the donkey.

'These hors d'oeuvres are real slop, and I mean that in the best sense.'

"This resumé has the kind of sizzle we're looking for."

'You could always say the dog ate your lesson plan.'

Diner

'I'll be honest with you. The pay isn't great.'

"And I suppose you expect me to pick that up?"

Gym Dog

Are you the guy who ate my brother?

"Wow, what a DILF."

Dog wearing jumper to hide his spots.

"He ate homework as a puppy but quickly moved onto business journals."

'In the alternate universe I've come up with, everything would be exactly the same except cats would bark.'

He prefers to play fetch with a medicine ball.

"Actually I never loved you."

Teacher's pet dog

'I taught him to shake hands, but I don't know where he got the joybuzzer!'

"Since when isn’t a taxidermied animal a comfort pet?" "Since forever!" "Dang it!"

'Roger, you're just a Rooster and I'm just a Hen. Is all of this necessary?'

'Someone's feeling bullish.'

"He ran out of pee."

'Beware of SUV.'

"I'm thinking considerably longer. How about you, Alan?"

'My dad must like you, or he would have charged by now.'

'How long have you had this obsessive hatred of cats?'

"We pride ourselves on defying expectations."

A skinny dog with clown make up