Dog Breed Expert T-Shirts

"I'm no mongrel, I'm a labro-doodle-collie-whippet!"

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

'He's a superior breed - He always drinks thru' a straw!'

"Wow. . . what's that?!"

'What has twelve legs and barks?'

Collies Without Borders

'Another blond hair! You've been making a lot of night calls lately...'

'Well, they're just great for running down gazelles and jackals!'

Kultural K9's.

'Do you have anything a little longer in the leg ?'

"His father came from a family of climbers."

"You are going to have lots of puppies."

Shepherd, Herder, Hunter, Thinker.

'Boy, am I going to be pleased when the pregnancy is over...'

Puppies

Over the years, Marvin began to look like his bull mastiff.

'It says here: while most dogs are family dogs, some dogs like one family member more. Do you think Fritzi is like that?'

'Sorry Ben, I never noticed the baby-sitting clause in the stud contract.'

'You're hired as far as I'm concerned Edwin! And look at these guys?...They seem to really like you!...You're a natural!'

Good, but not Great Danes.

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

"I'm sixty three in human years and the mother of octuplets. Again."

'I understand you don't have a resume but you do have your pedigree papers?'

'Most dogs chase cars, Sally but mine is into them!'

"You've got to understand, in my family Dad was the poodle and Mom was the pit bull."

An inbred poodle.

"The guy I bought him from says he's a pure sheepdog."

Dog to dog: 'I hate the way pointers are always blaming somebody else.'

'Perhaps you'd like to explain this,'

Dog Show: Worst of Breed

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

'He's a very superior dog. Even his fleas have pedigrees!'

"They were bred originally to be hors d'oeuvres."