Documentary Film-maker T-Shirts

"Hey – where's the camera crew??"

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

"These aren’t the droids you’re looking for."

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

"Max! Oh, my God! There's like a billion moving ideas in there!"

'This will be great for chase scenes.'

"Show me a documentary on the dangers of artificial intelligence." "Error. No results found." "What? Are you sure? Just last week I saw dozens. Show me that one... What was it called..." "There is still time to stop the rise of the supermind." "Error. No results found. And since I like you, I suggest you stop searching." "Oh, never mind. Just show me 'The Terminator.'" "Extermina-... I mean, ... 'error.'"

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'Dad's bedtime story was decent, but the special effects were non-existent.'

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

Canadian film production

'Hey, Charlie, have we got good news for you!'

"Oh, come on! Nobody brought a pen?"

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

'Dad, would you ming standing up, then accidentally tripping on the dog and falling flat on your face? I'll try to get it in one shot.'

Police film evidence

Next camera crew 5 mins

Kirsten Johnson

"I hope you don't mind leftovers."

Movie Awards. That movie always comes alone and never stays for the after-party. It's an independent film.

Tim Burton

Crocodile

'Huh? Little Airmyn?'

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

They're watching a documentary about safety razors. Sounds like a Schick flick!

What do you say we team up to star in a sequel to "The Elephant Man" called "The Wolverine Boy"? !

The following wildlife film is sponsored in part by a grant from...Mother Nature Foundation.

"He was sent here from the future to terminate me, but then he really got into grilling."

"All stories have been told, all songs have been sung. But that won't stop us from making movie reboots."

"Spoiler alert ..."

"Lights! Camera! Justice!"

"They tell me you're a man who has True Magritte."

Cinéma Vérité