Diy Warrior T-Shirts

'Forget what it looks like now. Think of what it will look like after you've put 10 years of loving care and back-breaking labor into it.'

Husband - 'Honey, the Vandamyer's are here!' Wife - 'I'll be down in a minute dear! I'm just polishing my nails.' (Woman polishing metal nails).

'We come in pieces.'

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

"Measure twice, cut once...and curse three times!"

"Something went wrong after you inserted tab A into slot B."

I did it my way.

"Remember now, anything is DIY-abe if you just do it yourself."

The Lion, the witch and the flat-pack self-assembly wardrobe: lion and witch putting a wardrobe together.

"It's my home grown quail call. Quail don't come when I blow it, but cows sure do."

"So, how did the audition go?" "Great! I really nailed it."

'Quit fooling around, Gog. Do the assignment.'

"I want that dressing-room mirror fired."

A barbarian warrior eats his breakfast

"I don't care what job you want, Bagshaw, for God's sake dress for the job you have!"

"It boils down to which I dislike more: ironing shirts or non-iron shirts."

Maria had always said you could never have too many shoes. Actually, she was wrong.

Cartoonist Stabbed By Censorship Swords

'You can scratch your back when the war is over!'

'I never said it was the comfy wear...I said it was the comfy look!'

'That stuff kills 98% of household germs, but leaves the remaining 2% limping around enough to maintain your resistance.'

"Is there a seamstress present?"

"I'm looking for a nice basic piece of clothing that can fulfill every need I have."

'Can you wear something quieter than those old corduroys?'

'Why can I never find my camouflage trousers?'

'Dude, ya hat's on backwards.'

"Remedial Karate"

"OK, now I want everybody to put their hands together and make something with tools!"

"...and you've got private use of it, so long as you don't exceed 10,000 mile per annum.'

"He may be Sven the Slayer to you, but to me he's still Mr Cuddly Bun!"

"Sorry to interrupt, I just wanted to say how much I hate your dress."

Organic farm

"Ok, boy, one more time, then I'd better get this thing back to the battlefield."

Fill idle hours by making your own rustic seat...use it when you want to relax.

'I tried on these jeans. I didn't think they were stretch jeans, but they stretched.'