Divinity Ponderer T-Shirts

'What did He do before he was God?'

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

'Please take your receipt!'

I know time is an earthly construct, but I still feel sleepy in the afternoons.

"It is just as the Oracle foretold!"

CartoonStock Upload

'I say we try it.'

"Why did God make fruit if he also made candy?"

"I'll have dessert first."

'Congratulations, you've got the job. Unfortunately though, you'll be constantly late, and we'll fire you in two months.'

'Are you sure we should do all this praying on Sunday? -- I thought it was God's day off.'

'Just one God? - But won't he be outnumbered?'

"I'm starting to prefer the ones who don't believe in me."

'...and please God, protect the social security fund for another sixty years.'

'Confusionism'

'He's always looking for an argument!'

God answers what He thought were worldwide prayers for peas.

Why not get God's fax number, and just fax him my prayer?

'The hardest part of being a street crazy is picking each day's sign.'

Jesus wept

'You'll be going on a long journey this Christmas.'

Fortune teller sees impending doom

The End is Near.

"NO I DON'T THINK YOU NEED LEGAL REPRESENTATION WHEN SAYING YOUR PRAYERS."

Soren Kierkegaard

'I know we're laying up treasures in Heaven, but I still think you should talk to the Church Board about your pension,'

A self-filling prophecy.

Various Birds of Pray.

"And God said, 'Let there be light.'" "CFL, incandescent or LED?"

A psychic predicts the discovery of gluten.

Evolution of God. . .

'What do they mean 'is borer a beast of the field'?'

'Before we begin, let's say a little prayer for humility.'

'Osgood was a theologian back on Earth, and he thought all this stuff would be allegorical.'

"I'll have whatever they're having."