Divine Joker Prints

'Fortunately the molting season doesn't last long.'

'Angelfood always DID make me break out.'

"I can't. You told him he could date after you came here."

"No, of course you can't appeal the decision. We don't have any lawyers up here."

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

The difference between cosmology and cosmetology.

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

Devil's food cake/Angel's food cake. Delivery mix-up.

I put a picture of my lunch on Facebook, and nobody hit "like." Who doesn't like Slim Jims and beer?

The Adventures of God

Clown God

"Is it true Dad...is the Earth really made of bleu cheese?"

Vishnu playing twin neck guitar.

Farmer chasing alien leaving crop circles.

'Did you check the glove compartment? -- maybe you left the keys in there.'

Pole Star

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

"Ever wondered about the development of mankind if, just before the big bang, a voice said 'Oops!'"

"It's not carrots but the love of carrots that's the root of all evil."

Astronaut sees cell tower on the moon.

Lesbians for Christ

Vacation Mobile

"See how it feels"

"Your next pilgrimage must be to a bodega for milk."

"I synchronized the complete household with the computer and the smartphone. Now I don't have to feel lonely when nobody is at home because I can talk to the loo."

HM Prison chapel, "try to think of the lord as a 24 hour video surveillance system gathering pictures for the ultimate crimewatch"

'Golly, is it that time already?'

"We use the proceeds to help offset the cost of your eternal salvation."

Eucharist

Climbing to the moon

"Dad, if there's a plot to the universe, can you see any spoilers?"

"And on the seventh day, God 'choked,' and all hell broke loose."

"Sorry - I've got to take this..."