Divine Dramatist Pillows

''Intelligent design'? -- Why, those patronizing little twerps!'

"Sorry, I can't - I have to be everywhere."

'This guy's asking for a motorcade.'

"That's Bob. He's a bit of a wing nut."

"There's always one!"

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

"O Lord—why art thou such a drama queen?"

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

'Hon, I'm home!'

Local News in Heaven

I'm sorry, all our angels are busy at the moment. Please hold and your prayers will be answered in the order it was received.

'Oh-oh -- What hath He wrought now?'

'Read that last part back to me.'

"Your mom needs to know that you made it here OK, and your dad wants to know if you could use a few bucks."

"Beware of God"

Vicar wearing sunglasses.

God passing the time.

'I'm afraid there is no Book of Loophole.'

Angel doing the hula hoop.

"So join me in prayer for those who are damned if they do and damned if they don't..."

2pm meet your Creator

"No, you cannot have another planet. You only played with the last one for a week."

"They have to clean her up before they show her to God."

"The amendments are coming next week!"

'Have you got anything for omnipotence?'

Excommunicate Me.

''Born again'? -- but I was just born five years ago!'

Out for lunch... GOD

'Sorry, pastor, your soul's grace period is eternity, your car's is six minutes.'