Divine Dichotomist Mugs

"He thought that was overkill."

'Today's sermon is on Eve and Adam....'

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

"You seem troubled, Pastor. Is anything worrying you...I mean aside from the sins of the world, the vanity of humankind, man's inhumanity to man..."

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

'We've re-branded.'

"I see you're back from church. What was cherry-picked for you today?"

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

"Then it's agreed. Judgment Day, whenever it comes, will fall on a Thursday, so that they'll get the long weekend."

I'm sorry, all our angels are busy at the moment. Please hold and your prayers will be answered in the order it was received.

'Are you sure You can be objective? -After all, You did CREATE them.'

'Oh-oh -- What hath He wrought now?'

"Any distinguishing 'PARSONAL' characteristics?"

'Read that last part back to me.'

"If everything is God's will, tell me again why I need to study for exams?"

'Okay - who leaked?'

Vicar wearing sunglasses.

'I'm afraid there is no Book of Loophole.'

'God sees everything? You mean He channel surfs?'

"So join me in prayer for those who are damned if they do and damned if they don't..."

A not-so-happy God, with the Humans, sticking an Eviction Notice to the Earth

"No, you cannot have another planet. You only played with the last one for a week."

2pm meet your Creator

"Having completed the formation of the earth, on the seventh day the Lord rested. Then, on the eighth day, the Lord said, 'Let there be problems.' And there were problems."

'Just one God? - But won't he be outnumbered?'

"Instead of Red Team and Blue Team, why don't we make it Good v. Evil?"

"If we went to war, wouldn't God be on the spot?"

Out for lunch... GOD