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After-Death Mints

"Well. . . the cost of living was getting too high, so. . ."

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

McMorkim's Cheeses Security A gang of mice wheeling in a giant mousetrap with Pizza and Beer as bait to a Security Guard's post hoping to gain access to a cheese Factory if the Guard is trapped.

God putting the finishing touches to the Pug.

Early photobombing

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

Suffering from Cooties?

"Did you remember to back up the last 4.5 billion years?"

"I sometimes think you're the only one who listens to me."

"You can either make a pledge or join us in this weekend's Barkathon."

"Are there treats? Just grab the treats and get outta there!"

'It's not for myself, you understand."

Mother Nature's Wild Ride 2007.

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

'Whoooa,MAN,check out this STORM! It's PELTING down!'

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

"It's cool – God told us to!"

Adam names the animals (He puts sticky notes on them saying Shaz, Dave, Trish etc).

'I swear by my spell checker. I have a mental block for spelling. Even 'Hooqued on Foniks' didn't help.'

"Well, Comstock, still regret putting our profits back into research?"

"So last Christmas it was those Cabbage Patch Kids."

'Hah! The joke's on you — I already thought up a second opinion!'

"Some mid-life crisis that turned out to be."

Newton had actually discovered gravity at a family dinner in his early childhood.

Alphabet soup gets cold for slow readers.

"This Adam and Eve thing -- Is there a warranty?"

Zeus's Caddy

"And almighty God said to Adam, 'Get a room already will ya!'" "Little known fact from the Book of Genesis."

Naked Mole Rat

"But you can eat as much as you want from the tree of bullshit."

I'm not sure which, but he's just invented either writing or vandalism. (Published originally on Feb. 11, 2011.)

'I'm sorry, your cheese has not matured enough!'

Batman O' War