Diversification Enthusiast Gifts

"Monogamy is like a portfolio with only one investment in it?"

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

'Intelligent Design? My arse!'

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

Figures from 'Ascent of Man' diagram all do the Conga: 'Let's all fo the Conga, na-na-na-na ...'

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

"Your mother called to remind you to diversify."

'It's really more of a family forest than a family tree.'

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

'Sure, go ahead! Evolve! It's all the rage, I know! Have fun! I'll just sit here in this murky, primordial soup with nothing but plankton for company. Why should you stay here with your mother? The one who raised you, fed you...'

Evolution Exam Results.

"I think we may be related!"

"So what makes you think you're qualified for this job?"

"I thought you wanted me to change."

"Darling, I think we need to talk about where this relationship is going..." Male evolution.

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

"I'm an evolution denier. There's no way those people come from us."

"I couldn't care less if being Homo Sapiens is the latest trend. While you're living in our cave, you better act like a true Neanderthal."

'That's Oog -- he got a haircut and a job.'

"Where are you going? I said we need to talk."

I told you we were late!

"Are we there yet?"

Fish evolving: 'Write, if you establish a niche.'

Brains - Java Man, Neanderthal Man, Modern Man.

"Evolution, here I come!" "Oh, no - the sea level is rising!" "There's still a chance!"

Big Rock University. Guidance Counselor. I'd like to switch my major from hunting to gathering!

'I wonder how Curious George fits into all this?'

"And now, speaking against the theory of evolution..."

'That's far enough for the first trip -- gather some soil samples and initiate re-entry procedures.'

'Did you really mean both me and a hippopotamus evolved from a tiny blob in the ocean?'

Ascent of man from ape to beer swilling football lout.

'When do they learn to stand upright?'

'If only Darwin could have seen this.'

'You know, until we learned to walk upright, I never realized how short you are.'