Directions Diva Prints

Brownie Points

'You the one who called Amnesty International?'

'Well OF COURSE I rotate the tires! How do you think I got here?'

'I'd steer clear of the rum punch.'

"Za Za Bling Bling goes man hunting."

How would Madam like to pay?

'I need it in a size two for now and a size five for when I put on my rebound weight.'

A day at the races

'Once a donzel, the dyvour now settled for orts.'

Cut out and keep your own Wardrobe Assistant.

"She has to arouse you, without, of course, actually arousing you."

"Say the whole prayer, none of this et cetera, et cetera..."

'I'd like to overwhelm them with instructional excellence, but I'm not above winning through intimidation.'

Social butterfly

"I admire the way you avoided that radar trap."

'I used to give directions by naming all the pubs along the route - I'm as lost as you are now!'

"Face it, you'd be lost without me!"

Men watching TV, shouting close him down.

"Can you loosen it a bit Andre, I can't close my eyes"

"If you ask me, good parenting requires clear boundaries, loving discipline and random acts of off-the-wall crazy."

Triceratops - "A Turtleneck? You couldn't get me a shirt with buttons?

'You precisely said 'straight over at the roundabout'. You didn't say anything about going around it.'

'It says the best way to stop undesirable behavior is to ignore it.'

Fashionistas 2012 - 'I'm Rapunzel!'

'What the blue blazes is a 'tunerfish' sam'wich!?'

"You said I'm not supposed to tell you how to drive... but you did miss the turn-off four miles back!"

Tarot Lying

'Baz? How the hell can you be 'going out' with an agoraphobic?!'

'Do you know what men and pantyhose have in common? They both run, cling, or don't fit properly.'

Woman walking through a bakery with blinkers on.

'Don't you know anything about fashion Mavis? It's now trendy to show your knickers.'