Diplomatic Envoy T-Shirts

"He's from the U.N. . . . you can tell by the bureaucrats who came with him."

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

"They decided giving out pink slips was too impersonal. So now they're blue."

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

"The kids love it, and it's saved my marriage."

"Be patient. He'll have to visit the water cooler sooner or later."

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

"I need to see your budget proposal."

"We can waste time and look for a solution or...just find a scapegoat?"

Inclusive speech

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

'You really want that promotion, don't you, Sherman?'

'The toughest things you have to deal with in this job, is feelings and lawyers.'

"That's the last time I'm going to allow politics to be discussed in the office."

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

'I am willing to concede that the company has been underperforming of late...'

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

Career Choices

'Here's another one that'll make you blow your stack.'

"It looks like the 'because I say so' has it."

'To close the deal, I had to make some minor concessions.'

'Would you be interested in attending a stress management seminar?'

'Congratulations Smith, you got that promotion. Commiserations Reid, you got that demotion.'

Incompatible.

"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."

Office meeting

"How come you always take Amnesty International's side?"

HR - Helping Relationships

'When you asked me over for a home-cooked meal, I assumed you'd be making it.'

"If I can't get a firm decision, I'd accept a wobbly acquiescence."

"I was going to have my people call his people, but I’m pretty sure his people have Caller I.D."

'You lack the expertise we're looking for, Mr Wheaton - but darn it, I like your attitude.'