Diploma Admirer Pillows

"Isn't that cute? He's reading his diplomas again."

'As I walk through the halls, I see teachers teaching and students learning and I say to myself, 'what wonderful school, what a wonderful world.''

Congratulations, and thanks for the $86,000... Congratulations, and thanks for the $86,000...

"He's very disciplined about his writing, every morning he stares at the keyboard for at least 4 hours before he allows himself a cup of tea!"

"I see here that you are a recent graduate."

"The labor market is awaiting you!"

'Gastroenterology...do I know that?'

"I've been studying reverse psychology at Tonga Tech Online University."

'Congratulations! And please give your parents this receipt for $148 thousand.'

Morton's pride was understandable. He was the first in the Pinhead Family to ever graduate.

"Congratulations. Please remember the college's financial plight. Congratulations. Please remember the college's financial plight. Congratulations. Please remember . . ."

We learn by doing

I've been scouting new locations for the strip. Great. We can certainly use some. Have you found anything exciting so far? Yes. A bench on the other side of the park. It has a trash can in the background.

"Sorry, but you need at least a Masters to get into the Deep Woods."

"The best part is, for me history is now history!"

Graduate

"And now, we embark on a new chapter..."

Let me guess...you peed on your homework again!

"If you insist on giving me a gift for being accepted into Oxford, I could use a new DVD player...gift wrapped in a BMW."

Graduation Creation of Adam

"I'm very proud of the grade A's, son, but what about these grade B smalls?"

Why The Other DInosaurs Couldn't Stand The Thesaurus

"Boun giorno, Gorby!" "Buon giorno, Bush!"

Principal: 'Is THERE a DOCTORATE in the House?!'

"Some guys from the state board of medicine are here to see you."

'Nobody likes a smartass, Bob.'

Where's The Prize?

'I'm sorry - Mr. Jenkins, MBA, PhD, MD, Esq. is O.U.T.'

"It is my wish that this be the most educated country in the world, and toward that end I hereby ordain that each and everyone of my people be given a diploma."

After years of study & hard effort, you're ready to begin your life's work. . . paying off your student loan."

"School is loverly this time of year."

Sherlock Holmes gets back at Professor Moriarty through reduced research funding.

'Thanks, I started collecting diplomas when I was seven.'

"You put PhD on birth certificate?!" "It's never to early to give em an advantage."

'She didn't want to go out with you even though you told her you had a h-index of 37! Boy I don't understand women!'