Dinner Reservation Strategist Gifts

'Get your priorities right, Graham! Book the restaurant AFTER you've called the fire brigade!'

Come dine with me!

'Men order. . . women shop.'

'Well, if you're going to order 'left wings' and I'm going to order 'right,' maybe we should just order burgers instead.'

'A Quarter-Tonner, please.'

'I'll be conducting Mahler 3 as the guests arrive.'

"Mine says this relationship will never work out and I should dump you right now!"

"As your attorney, I advise you to assign blame, question motives, attack the media, THEN send your steak back to the kitchen."

'Every war game scenario I've run has you picking up the check.'

'You talk about her so much. Why don't you invite that Alma Mater of yours to dinner sometime?'

'This chicken has no taste or character.' 'I thought you wanted to eat it, not offer it a job.'

'Here ya' go, sweetie. Our Key Lime Pie.'

'The Boss is coming to dinner tonight - please don't open a can of worms again.'

"The chef recommends the most expensive dish on the menu."

"What would you suggest as a dinner strategy?"

Being the gentleman he was, Brian insisted on paying in restaurants even though he suddenly realised that dating a bacterium was going to be more expensive than he first thought.

'Smells good. What is it?'

'Please have the bouncer throw me out before the dessert course.'

"Well, we can eat out, order in, or just sit here and let our bodies slowly gnaw away at our muscle tissue."

"You have zero empathy, Carlton. And I can't even begin to imagine what that's like."

'If you get one who refuses to wake up, pour it in his lap.'

"The specials I didn't order sound so much better when you describe them to other people."

"Do you have a menu sorted by relevance, average customer review, and price low to high?"

'I'm impressed at your choice sir, you certainly know your budget wines.'

TGI Doomsday.

"Once again the correct answer is 'I don't know.'"

'So what's it to be, Indian cuisine, Chinese take out or are you going to do the usual Russian Roulette?'

'If you don't have room for vegetables, you don't have room for dessert, so I put your vegetables on top of your ice cream.'

'It's half as good as our $10 special.'

The new microwave has been a great time-saver for Monica, she can burn dinner and still have plenty of time to make restaurant reservations

'5 pounds of liver ought to be enough to get your husband to take you out for dinner.'

"And we give you sixty seconds to complete your order or Joey does it for you."

"I never have a starter. That way I have room for 3 puddings!"