Dinner Protector Prints

"Hello, Mr. Gottlieb of Acme Telemarketing? Oh, did I interrupt your dinner...?"

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

'There's something hauntingly familiar about the bouquet.'

'I'm sorry young lady, but you're not old enough to be free range!'

I've got to monitor all chatter in the cafe to prevent future pastry thefts. I don't know … What if you've got a scone thief for a neighbor, or a friend, or even a family member? Sure, today it's just a scone. But the next attack could be huge – the big one! You don't mean … Hoagie. They're trying to destroy our whole way of life.

"Yes, a table for three: me, him and his ego."

"I've taken the liberty of adding eight thousand dollars to your check so that, while you're stunned with disbelief, I can bang your wife."

'She thinks of them as her children...'

"Sure we could just print out the specials, but the chef doesn't want to leave a paper trail."

"Hey, guess what we're having for dinner tomorrow."

'My union prevented taking away our dental plan to pay for executive bonuses!'

"Hey, that's your personal pan pizza. NO SHARING!"

"Even more dangerous than crossing the road is being undercooked."

"You don't want me. I've got bird flu!"

"Why, yes, I am 'still working on that.' You know what I'm not working on? Your gratuity!"

'Whew! Looks like the Tuna Surprise isn't much of a hit!'

In certain parts of the world, chili-peppers have become a valuable commodity!

'Pasta imposter' "Oi! You're not vermicelli, you're cheese string..bugger off!!"

"Does your waitress have any identifying marks or tattoos?"

'In this district, Constable, you can't be too careful!'

"Must you people always call at dinnertime?"

Tired of searing the roof of his mouth when he ate pizza, Gary swore by his new Pizza Shield.

'Proud yes, but enough to try it again!'

"While you were busy checking fantasy scores, your fantasy dinner went cold."

Bird Flu in Mexico.

Magic to prepare food

'I'm eating right now. Can you call me back when I'm not eating?'

'I knew something was wrong when I couldn't find my dinner.'

"Listen girl! That is a rotisserie! Get out of that house! Get out!"

"How did I find my steak? Well I lifted up a roast potato and there it was."

Finally, a good personal-pylon.

'Any way I could play through?'

Damn. Avian flu hit hard.

"Uh oh, we've landed near a nest ... Hand me the bug spray."

'Okay, give me a clue. Animal, vegetable, or mineral?'