Dinner Party Fan Gifts

"Your lasagna was dismal, as was the coffee, but you, Sofi, are fabulous at Pictionary!"

"... And I also have a daughter from a previous 'one night stand'."

'I didn't know about his expansionist tendencies when I married him.'

Soup was always difficult at Uri's house.

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

"I love this place—its food, its ambience, and its political goals."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

"You do like octopus?"

It's not because I'm nervous. The reason I'm not eating is because I really do have butterflies in my stomach.

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"All of tonight's specials dance around the whole GMO thing."

'Life is all attitude: 45 seconds of enjoying it...45,000 hours of regretting it...'

"I say it's Kale, and I say it's spinaches shitfaced uncle."

"When portions are this huge, I eat half now and the rest in a few minutes."

"Hi. What kind of wine goes with fruit salad?"

Love is in the air...

'Don't let him pick the wine. He thinks Dom Perignon was someone who got knocked off on the Sopranos.'

"It was a cheese and wine party but the mice got there first!"

'Would you like you steak WITH or WITHOUT a capella?'

"Joel! Killer crust!"

Chicken Little was correct about something falling, unfortunately, it was an axe, and not the sky.

Selfish shellfish - 'You kids share your food and stop being shellfish!'

'The Ambassador will not be pleased, Madame.'

'So much for your theory that mixing two 50-point-rated wines equals one rated 100.'

'She thinks it makes her look enigmatic.'

An experimentalist alarms his guests by describing the appearance of the mushrooms in a dish they have just eaten.

'I made your favorite for dinner — pterodactyl nuggets!'

'We'll start with a menu and a glass of water.'

'George, you're supposed to be tasting the wine, not seeing what effect it has.'

'Giles is a surgeon who likes to bring his work home with him.'