Dining Punster Mugs

"The meatloaf just tapped S.O.S. in Morse code."

"That's it. We’re toast."

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

Dogs life

Alas poor Daisy, I knew her well!

'I'm going to try that 'vegan' thing, Joe -- give me some beer nuts.'

Note Book

Wordplay: Rabbit Punch.

"It's made with real angel hair."

If Einstein had worked in Fast Food

'Sticky nuts...' "Umm nice nuts but not as sticky as us buns!!"

Deviled HamDeviled Eggs.

You heard right - one large cheese pizza, and tell the driver to take it out of the box and leave it in the yard,

A Tongue Stud.

"Hallelujah!"

"The pompano poached in parchment is very alliterative tonight."

"I do lover a good prawn film!"

"Listen, you're no picnic, either."

"Are you sure this is the Irish guacamole?"

'If you want to improve your golf score, the best wood to use is a pencil with an eraser.'

"But I ordered death by chocolate."

"Behold the geometry of pizza: square, circle and triangle."

'Well, I just met the girl of my dreams -- you know, the kind you have when you eat anchovy pizza right before bed.'

"Lots of people want to hold me, but no one really cares."

Ernie's the person who put the "quiz" in cuisine.

"Processed food was his undoing. He was eating a salad sandwich in the warehouse, when a pallet of pork pies fell on him!"

Pork Sausage.

Famous Side Dish Trials. The Cabbage Case. Now, tell the jury what happened after the chef pulled out his knife …. (Sob) It was a SLAWter!

'I'm not the first visionary who's been accused of extreme optimism.'

"I'm afraid you've got a serious case of polka dots."

fried eggs...

"It's ok - you're not the first man to lose his head over a pretty girl. . ."

Flower: 'I wouldn't go in there if i were you Pal. The place is full of Skinheads.'

"It's true escargot will add calories to the meal, but very slowly."

"I just had a horrible dream - I was wallowing in apple sauce."