Dining Delight Discoverer Prints

"Would you say the tuna salad kicks ass?"

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

'Still not ready to talk? Ok dip him again.'

"The finger bowl is courtesy of the gentleman."

Platter confusion.

"What!?! I like a nice salad every now and then, too. What of it?"

'Would you like some of our house wine? I just made it.'

"I think what I love most is the smile on her face as she feeds me!"

"I just found a lacto-vegan restaurant and Janet from accounts says she's FRUITAIAN!"

"Our sommelier - years of experience in French urinals."

'Greek restaurant?' 'No, menu upside down.'

"I'm trying to decide between water and sunlight."

"Have you had a chance to look at the menu?"

"The chef recommends the most expensive dish on the menu."

"Don't you just love it when they lick the plates?"

"Meditation is too hard. How do you keep one thought in your mind for this long?"

"Are you enjoying your escargot?"

"Waiter - there's a fly in my soup."

Hollywood cafe: celebrity in the house!

"In addition to the menu, we have a few specials on the board."

'Waiter, there's going to be a fly in my soup!'

"How did you find your steak, sir?"

'Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday you like beans.' 'Now you don't.'

'I'll give you a tip mate, stop looking down my wife's dress'

'I'll be back to take your order as soon as I've eaten.'

"Crocuses! It's spring!"

'I try to watch what I eat, but my eyes aren't always fast enough...'

"It's new. It's called a pre-tip. You pay me now and I'll actually bring your food before it's cold!"

'Is anything O.K.?'

'It's not nouvelle cuisine, Monsieur. You've ordered from the children's menu.'

The Cheese God

'These are natural and organic ... two slabs of hog's bacon deep fried in crispy batter and dipped in chocolate.'

'Freezer is on the blink.'

'How's the chilli today?'; 'Much better than yesterday - I think it had a good night's sleep.'