Digital Finance Follower Pillows

'Your wealth is no longer on paper. It's in cyberspace.'

'The check is in the email attachment.'

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

"Oh I have plenty of sex appeal. It's all here in my bank baalance."

'Stocks rose on the rumor that the market is mostly rumor-driven.'

"On Wall Street today, news of lower interest rates sent the stock market up, but then the expectation that these rates would be inflationary sent the market down, until the realization that lower rates might stimulate the sluggish economy pushed the mark

"This just in... All new Euro notes are to be printed on Greece-proof paper."

Building a better America - Financing by The Bank of China.

Shares Nosedive

'U.S. stocks surged on news that the government they all hate won't go out of business.'

'Wouldn't it be easier if the banks simply merged with the Inland Revenue?'

Euro around the world.

Deposits insured by the U.S. Government (which has a $4.2 trillion debt).

The euro as a monster

The market went up and down, up and down, up and down...

"Oh, just sitting back and letting algorithms do all the stock trading."

Money Today: "Ours is a cybercurrency. It's not a virtual currency or a cryptocurrency."

"Today, stocks dropped on news the new federal reserve chief, Janet Yellen, is a 'rookie'."

'Stocks soared on news a financial lobbyist wants 'greed' dropped as one of the cardinal sins.'

Financial crisis and layoffs

Three businessmen looking up at the euro wobbling on a tree waiting for it to fall

"Your Board has decided to downsize its commitment to honesty and integrity by around 35% of the fiscal year."

"The new technology means we can watch our shares fall on four different continents."

'I'll give you a HUGE bonus in bitcoins if you can explain to me what the hell they are.'

"I'm going out to keep consumer spending in line with Wall Street expectations."

'Greenspan was back for a guest appearance. He didn't say it's gonna be a bear market. He said it's a beware market!'

'Honey, I swear, I wasn't out wallstreeting!'

Good day at the office?

"Is this an upturn or another calm before the storm?"

'Requisition a bigger chart.'

'Lady G., I think you should know ol' Warren B.'s holding period is forever.'

Customer to broker: 'Before I invest with you, I have to check your credibility ... how many ulcers have you had?'

"Analysts blamed the market's volatility on computer-directed trading while computers blamed it on analyst-directed trading."

'Charles, I want you to meet Joel. You have lots in common. He also thinks he knows how to time the market.'

''Swiper's Wrist.' I'm prescribing 7 to 10 days of 'Cash Purchases only.'