Digital Distractee Gifts

Breaking News: Earth Crosses Multiple Lanes, Crashes into Sun... Distracted Orbiting to Blame.

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

Screen Time vs Book Time

Guru.

"You think you have problems? My entire wing command was just destroyed."

"DID YOU SEND THIS?"

"I virtually finished my homework."

"I'm just saying, if you had to turn off the TV, would you still remember how?"

"I reached Level Three of Super Mario Brothers!"

"No sense of smell, ears plugged and eyes fixed on their phones. I'm telling you, if I weren't domesticated I'd be all over that."

"I am in the moment - just not the moment you're in."

'Will this job requirer me to look up from my phone?'

"I'm just checking my inbox."

Sell me your souls and I'll make all cell phones and computers go away."

Diving Judge: Sorry, I Was Looking At My Phone.

'Dad, can I speak to you, offline, about father son bonding?'

'I'm busy flinging birds at pigs, go away.'

"I am doing my homework, but it's hard not to get distracted in this click-bait media environment."

"Don't forget to empty the dish washer."

Facebook - You have 17 requests to get on with your work.

"Am I the only one who can see that sign?"

"No cell phone, no e-mails... boy, I've never felt so free1"

'The doctor will see you shortly. He has a few hundred email jokes he has to forward.'

"My life is one unending pop-up ad."

"hey fans! im at bat,. btm 9th, bases loaded, score tied--oops, jst got called strike1!"

Supermarket Self Service Checkout

"Hang on...I think you're losing me."

'Can't you take out the trash, Mom? ? I'm busy deleting junk e-mail.'

"You need to get out here – we just had another texting-while-walking mishap."

"I bet the decline in the U.S. birth rate is thanks to Wordle."

"Can I call you back? I'm shopping."

This P.C. has been porn free for 23 days

"My husband fell into the bear enclosure! I threw my phone down there. I think it bought him some time."