Digital Detox Diva Gifts

"You need to disconnect for awhile and unwind."

“It's a tree, sweetie. No need to Google it.”

"You realize there’s probably an app for all this?!"

"Hello? Speaking, not listening."

'When I asked you to do research for your assignment, I meant the library not on Google!'

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

Screen Time vs Book Time

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

"Nature speaks to me of God’s presence, yet God is a total stranger to the restless world of men." "Why the #!@* is there no signal?!"

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

The Modern Novel.

"It's wonderful to be away from the rat race. So, what happened on 'CSI: Miami' last night?"

"It takes a few days for them to detox from screens."

"Nice try, Jim, but there's no such thing as a 'Beer cleanse'."

Downloading Pregnancy

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

Hiking sign - Stop, pause, play, skip forward, skip back

"Don't open me, you fool!"

"Lately, I've been trying to spend less time staring at the glowing orb."

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

America Off-line.

"Influence this."

"According to my phone, society is on the brink of collapse, but, according to our living room, things seem pretty O.K."

'I don't want to talk to any flunkies. Put me straight through to the computer.'

'I'm detoxing - do you have any mineral water?'

"You spend far too much time on social media, Joe!"

'My best method for relieving stress is to misplace my cellphone.'

The Lost Tribe

I'd like to order a power outage. Huh? My wife's on her phone all day, my son plays video games nonstop. My boss finds me by email wherever and whenever. My pager rings 'round the clock! Say again? I was text messaging. Pull the plug, man!

"There's no phones, social media, selfies, reality TV, online trolls, political-correctness or fake news."

'Let's have a quiet romantic evening together...we'll turn our cell phones off.'

"My smart watch says I’m really dumb."

Children's games and technology

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