Digital-age Dad Gifts

No caption (A daughter shines a light from her cellphone as her dad makes a Twitter icon shadow puppet).

At the modern antenatal class.

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

"We realize that kids start using technology at a younger age these days, so our strollers come with Bluetooth, Wi-Fi and GPS."

'Shhh... It's babies app time.'

'Your parents are way too overprotective.'

The modern generation!

'I'm a work-at-home dad.'

"Dad's at that awkward age when he knows just enough about computers to really screw 'em up!"

I think we need to get him outside more often. iPad … iPad …

"Sorry Mom, but I really need to take this call."

"Wasn't it your turn to drop him to online school?!"

'I do set limits. For example, he wasn't allowed to use the tablet computer until after he downloaded a potty training app.'

'Baby's got his first blue tooth!'

"There's no umbilical cord. But don't worry... it just means your baby is connected to you via wifi."

"We named him XB32116 so we never forget the Wi-Fi password."

"Not now, honey. Daddy's arguing with strangers about the sexual orientation of puppets."

"The kids? They're great! Karen got retweeted by a famous YouTuber and Timmy just hit 16K Insta followers. They start influencing so quickly, don't they?"

"Hey honey, I found this great article about protecting kids from social media on Facebook!"

"Your Covid-19 Test Results Are In..."

"Honey, will you text grace, please?"

"Honey, please don't talk to Daddy when he's in a chat room."

'I'm too tired to listen to a story tonight, mom. Just e-mail something and I'll read it tomorrow.'

"At which trimester will I be able to communicate with my baby via text?"

'Oh, yeah? Wanna bet my Dad has more passwords than your Dad?'

"Sometimes I think I have the best kids in the world. But maybe I should google it just make sure."

"Aww, look. Baby just seeped her first credit card!"

"Dress it up all you want – it's still and invasion of my privacy."

'It used to be enough to keep them fed and clothed. Now it's fed, clothed and connected.'

"Mom! Download this app, make an account, sign in and scan this code to see what I made for you."

'How do you block the kids from objectionable internet content? I found a bookmark called,'DriveYourParentsInsane'.'

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"Do you have any video games that would help reduce my role as a father?"

We ARE playing catch.

"I planned on cutting the cord myself but my phone app beat me to it."