Diagnosis Navigator Gifts

"He's here to give you a second, cooler opinion."

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

The Life of Pi

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

'Are we there yet?'

'I want to forewarn you that my HMO won't approve any treatment that uses a needle.'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

"He was the one everyone called 'The Greatest.' Then one day, a stranger turned up in town."

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

"I am not asking for directions."

Titanic: How's my steering.

Battery Lighthouse

'The dripping keeps me awake!'

'He refuses to leave without the tree and their son.'

'I told you not to rely on the sat-nav.'

"For pity's sake, George - stop tooting and ask for directions!"

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

'The landscape is continually shifting Son, so you have to learn to navigate by the Sun and the stars...'

Hospital Departments

'The good news is that it's not your fault.'

"According to the map, we should be nearing the North Pole, but something tells me we’ve been reading the map upside down."

"Yeah, I have a GPS, but I have no idea where 120 degrees longitude and 80 degrees latitude is."

"This translation app isn't working."

"A storm rages from the East - tell the men to get below and snuggle up for movie night."

'In my experience, life is good most of the time, but come the holidays, they look at me as if I'm a nuisance...'

"You are here"

Set sail

"Look lively crew, lest we be dashed upon these scrumptious shores."

'Captain, there's someone pissing in the hold!'

"With the benefit of hindsight, I’d say no, Ed, it wasn’t ‘funny’ letting him steer the boat!"

"Your Majesty, my voyage will not only forge a new route to the spices of the East but also create over three thousand new jobs."

"According to the charts, it should be clear sailing after this."

"Eating a diet rich in vibrant colors does not mean a bowl of Skittles."

The guy who took a wrong turn off the electronic superhighway and wound up in a microwave oven in Davenport, Iowa.