Determined Dieter Pillows

One week after new year. The rest of the year.

"Dieting all morning, and for what?!"

"I hope that's low calorie eye of newt."

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

'Let me at it! Let me see!!'

"...there, I found it. Stellar! I love this nutrition app!"

"Dear Diary... I've stopped smoking, and I'm sticking to my diet."

'Of course I followed the diet religiously. I do everything religiously.'

'Tomorrow we'll just have lettuce and water, OK.'

How Wafer-Thin Mints Stay Thin.

Woman and sport trainer

'What I like about these diet pills is that they're chocolate covered.'

A diet high in cholesterol can be dangerous to your health.

"You're suffering from an overdose of food."

'You're going to go on a diet.'

Snacking on yourself causes NO net weight gain!!!

'I've started this new 'Detox' diet - no caffeine or alcohol...no processed foods...

Maude finally gets rid of her giant ass.

'Knock off the between-feast snacking.'

Cream tea...without the cream,butter or jam and no milk with the tea!

'Chew each bite ten times? †I'm a busy man!'

"The clouds of heaven have a load limit of 65 KG! Everyone over the load limit sinks down to Hell! 65,3 KG! You should not have eaten that last cake!"

'Weight loss can cause liver damage...'

"Don't forget to deduct 2 pounds for my clothes and 5.5 ounces for my phone."

"Another diet?"

"No . . . erasing food-search-apps from your browser history doesn't count as dieting."

'It looks like your computer may block cookies, but you don't.'

'No, I didn't cheat on Bob. It was worse than that. I cheated on my diet.'

"This Subway Diet is way better than that Atkins nonsense."

I still think the anti-personnel mines are a bit over the top.

Fantasy Diet League

There's a thin person inside me trying to get out...probably more than one.

The Fast Diet

'I lost twelve pounds.'

'I'm on three different diets. That way I get to eat more.'