Desk Chair Strategist T-Shirts

'Warm a chair...swill coffee...thumb through catalogues and surf the Internet... By golly, Ted, he's RIGHT. They're all in his job description!'

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

'Now that I have your attention...'

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

"'Quid pro quo' is a no-no, Bradbury. Around here we say 'reciprocal altruism'."

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

Businessman on stilts: 'I had to step over a lot of people to get where I am today.'

'I'll be late for dinner, dear, I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

"I believe we've found the weakest link."

"I realize we had to liquidate some assets, but don't you think I'd be more productive if I had a desk?"

"Jackie, why does your relationship status read ‘capitulated to’ me?!"

'Had I known Hell was going to be exactly like work, I probably wouldn''t have spent as much time there.'

'I like the way you handle responsibility, McWit, so I'm going to blame some stuff on you.'

"Morning, all!"

'Sorry, suffering from burnout return in a week.'

'The sunglasses idea would have worked if you hadn't started snoring.'

"Remember...when the going gets tough...DELEGATE!"

Business of Fingerpointing Line Art

"I suppose just climbing the greasy pole is no longer an option..."

"I'm overpaid and underworked, but you don't see me complaining!"

Food Chain, Inc: 'UP...DOWN'.

"Mr Frimley will see you now."

Time for More Paperwork

"They've hiked up our targets again...I'm going to have to put in some overtime to have any chance of meeting them!"

'I'm sorry but I'm afraid the corporation is going in a different direction.'

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

"Now, let's get out there and walk really fast to places we don't want to be."

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

"Better than a business model, I have a business scheme."

'So do you want me to minute that George is dying of boredom and Nigel will rip my head off if I don't stop boring him with my blather?'