Office Strategist T-Shirts

"Any questions?"

"Miss Dugan, will you send someone in here who can distinguish right from wrong?"

"Somewhere out there, Patrick, is the key to increased sales. I want you to find that key, Patrick, and bring it to me."

"I'm sorry. When I told everybody that we started in the mailroom together, I didn't realize you were still there."

'Implementing these changes won't be easy. We're pretty set in doing things the wrong way.'

'Are you thinking what I'm thinking?'

Boss loads sales people with paperwork and wonders why they aren't selling

'Don't worry if you don't know the rules -- we're making it up as we go along ...'

'Refresh my memory, Ms. Hamish. Which little square am I - on the organizational chart?'

'Your hindsight on this case, was far more accurate than his forsight.'

'Sure it's a partnership, Elwood, but it's a limited partnership, and you're the one who's limited.'

'I'm going to train you to 'Confront Difficult People'... okay, raise your hands if you're a difficult person.'

'How'll we handle this?'

Here are the latest strategic proposals on 'managing the paperless office'.

"Encouraging dissent is a good way of finding out who the traitors are."

'I agree... He's had a brilliant career trajectory. But a lot of people sure got hurt along the way.'

'Here is a big problem. Your job is to divide it into smaller problems and blame it on other people.'

"I'm a big, big problem. Aren't I?"

"Unofficially I can tell you that the information that you want to know is SECRET...but if you give me a few months to talk to the rght people and grease a few palms then I think I'll be able to get official..."

'Gentlemen, we need new blood!'

Office Canteen: 'Getting in a consultant is win-win for us... we'll get the credit if it's a success - but, if it all goes wrong, we've got someone else to blame!'

"Don't listen to her - she's a control freak. Now, let me tell you what you're gonna do."

'Yeah, but they sure make negotiations go faster.'

"Done at last. I wonder how old my kids are?"

'We're presently entangled in a power struggle.'

"The team needs LEADERSHIP, anyone have a view on that?"

Today we see for ourselves what's in the Pipeline."

"Remember, you weren't hired to think-you were hired because you have opposable thumbs."

'This project is so important that we can't let anything more important interfere with it.'

A meeting room with two teams of businessmen in huddles on opposite sides of the room.

'we need to do some out of the box thinking.'

Does your accountant share your vision?

'OK ladies and gentlemen, when I start the music start circling the chairs. When the music stops please take up your new post...'

"Of course the most important skill they can acquire is the ability to multi-task!"

'We're having a meeting and it will not end until we find out why no work is getting done.'