Descendants Mugs

"Everyone here is alive because I got laid."

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

Young Frank Lloyd Wright

'Hurry, wipe it off before Dad comes home!'

"Young Frankenstein"

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

Joey discovers the difference between coffee beans and jelly beans.

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

"This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I told you to go outside and play."

"Bond James, Bond."

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

Skipping Horse

I should be a writer when I grow up...

Computer Room.

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

At the Museum

'Here you go, kid! A worm.'

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

Grace For Flies

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

I like the Jets...I guess

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

Football Fans

"My political platform focuses on more ice cream and more frisbee chasing, with less chores and fewer baths."

Director/Action Man toy.

"You created a robot to do your homework for you? Apparently, laziness is the mother of invention."

Wildlife