Derby Lover Gifts

Pompous horse rider pt. 2

Man struggling to remember how he got home the morning after the derby

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

'You both know the rules -- walk 1 paces, turn, and tee off on each other.'

'Remember last Saturday. . . you were bold that day. No dear, caught.'

'The rivalry at the pony club is getting out of hand!'

"Wait! Stop! He changed his mind."

Baseball Dreams

-Psst! Back me in the 4:30! -Oh! -Surprised I can talk, huh? -No, surprised you think you can win!

'Diet? Yeah I'm on a prop's diet...pies,chips,burgers and coke!'

"You're back! You're really back...!"

'So what do we have here?' - dart board says, Take the Day Off, Ignore the Loser,Do What the Goof Says, and Act Interested.

'Talk about lack of trust! My trainer didn't even bet on me, but I showed him: I won the race!'

"See, I told you he didn't want to go out."

"Our new dog seems to be really, really shy!"

Formula One car models

Three ducks: two have normal bills, third one has bill turned around like bill of cap.

Greville Starkey

Champagne speaking to lobster about going to the Derby

"I don't care if you are a Leicester City fan - you can come down off that cloud right now!"

Hang Time Fido

You can take the girl out of Wimbledon...

"My word! I do believe that your hat is eating mine!!"

Art Darts

"Morning!"

A tightrope walker balances while holding hearts.

'I'm afraid being based in Harley Street doesn't mean I fix sick Harleys!'

The Doctor encounters the dreaded cydermen.

Runner with a kick-starter.

'I think the dog wants to go for a walk.'

'Before I throw can you tell me if my feet are behind the line?'

Way-too-easy rider.

"And here goes the gun signalling the start of the season."

'Once more dear. A touchdown is worth how many points?'

'It's not necessary to challenge the champ, your manager has already done that.'