Dental Procedure Pillows

'You'll be a new man after this procedure.' 'Good, send my bill to the new man.'

'Get them whitened? It took me $50,000 and five thousand bottles to get them this way.'

"He had his teeth whitened."

"Oh, I like coming to the dentists. It's the only place where people actually ask me to spit!"

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

The tooth fairy.

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

'The doctor's gonna have to wire your mouth shut for a month... but guess what! If you're brave, I'll give you this lollipop when he's done!'

"Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?"

'It's the same everywhere: body over brains.'

"Pollyanna, your teeth are shot. Stop sugar coating everything!"

'When you said you had an investment in gold, you didn't mention it was in your teeth!'

Oct. 1982: Researchers attempt an ill-fated procedure in great white shark oral hygiene.

"Really? You can make me look younger!"

"Since you're going to the dentist, I bought you a giant lollipop to go out in style."

No Cavity Club/No New Gum Receding Club

"I'd like to change my major from dental to mental."

'What kind of filling would you like?'

Love conquers all, except plaque.

Shark with Braces.

Improvised Dentistry.

'The $75 for floss wasn't for his teeth... we had to tie him to the chair.'

Look on the bright side...they'll probably name a disease after you.

Toothless Meal

'Oddly, few archaeologist comment on the flossing habits of Easter Island inhabitants.'

"The colonoscopy isn't your eternal punishment...the prep is."

Facelift Book.

"Wait, I'm texting the tooth fairy...I always like to keep her informed of these visits."

J. Wilbert Dentist - Sorry We're Open

"That explains all the cavities."

1688: Pirate Dentistry - "Say ARR!"

Car Dentistry.

"Let's take it again from the top...but this time with more fillings."

'My dentist recommended it.'